****** GI JOE 3 3/4" NEWSLETTER ****** Issue #3 June 6, 1996 http://www.ecnet.net/users/mucds/joehq.htm Yo Joe! Welcome to issue three! I apologize for the delay in getting this issue out but, well, sometimes delays are inevitable. I'm proud to say that this issue is filled to the brim with subscriber contributions! We are now up to around 60 subscribers! Big thanks go out to everyone who has shown support for and interest in this newsletter so far! Everyone that hasn't given some feedback yet- please do so! I'm very interested in your opinions and what you'd like to see in this newsletter and on the web page. Speaking of the web page- it has undergone significant astetic improvement! We are now listed in Yahoo (thanks Steve & Conor!) and are getting about 100 hits/week. Check it out if you haven't recently. Disclaimer time again. :) The opinions (if any) presented in the articles contained herein do not neccessarily represent the opinions of the entity called the GI Joe 3 3/4" Newsletter, its subscribers, and/or "staff". Without further ado let's get on to issue #3! List moderator: Corey Stinson (mucds@bgu.edu) Editor: Corey Stinson (mucds@bgu.edu) Contributing editor: Josh Zyber (jzyber@acs.bu.edu) Contributing editor: Benjamin Ian Thomas (BThomas828@aol.com) Webmaster: Corey Stinson (mucds@bgu.edu) Table of contents: ---------------------------------------------------------- 1. Unreleased 3 3/4" GI Joes - The Ninja Commandos 2. "Shot In The Dark" - part I (original GI Joe fan fiction) 3. GI Joe Survey & the "Toy Zone" Fanzine 4. Role-Playing GI Joe 5. Ready for a sing-along? 6. Dealer Section 7. Hasbro Web Site 8. Issue #4 Preview 9. Subscription Information/Missed An Issue? ======================================================================== UNRELEASED 3 3/4" GI JOES - THE NINJA COMMANDOS With the cancellation of the 3 3/4" GIJoe line in late 1994, many of the proposed 1995 figures were left in the development stages at Hasbro, including the infamous Manimals and a very nice Baroness figure that would have made an excellent addition to any Joe collection. Unless we're willing to shell out enormous sums of money, the average Joe collector will probably never see any of these in the flesh (or in the plastic, as it were). Yet it may still be possible to get hold of a piece of what should have been, because the 1995 line of "Ninja Commando" figures did receive a limited production run of about 10,000 each that were never shipped to stores, at least not yet. Here's the rundown. Because of Hasbro's endless fascination with ninjas, ninjas, and more ninjas we were supposed to see the release of 5 new (you guessed it) ninja figures. They were: a new Storm Shadow in a white outfit with a gray face mask (a nice-looking figure indeed) with the requisite spring-loaded "Skull Smash" arm movement; a new Budo (switching allegiances from samurai to ninja) in a black outfit with blue trim; a bizarre figure called Knock-Out with an odd purple, silver, and flesh-tone color scheme and a purple face mask; Flint (yes, Flint!) suddenly rushing through that ninja training - his body is a red and gray repaint of Big Boa, and he's wearing a gray face mask that looks like it may be the head of Firefly ('91); and finally, proving that anyone can become a ninja by taking just a few night courses, there is of all people a ninja Road Pig - his upper body looks pretty much the same as the original figure, but his legs are new, and this time his hair is black with a shocking green streak down the middle. Pictures of all these can be found in the first GI Joe Convention issue [ed: 1995 Convention] of "Action Figure News and Toy Review," which is available through Cotswold Collectibles if you ask nicely. Currenly, only one of these figures has ever hit the toy shelves. Budo, repainted in shades of red, was released as part of the Mortal Kombat movie tie-in line of figures by Hasbro. This figure's name escapes me at the moment, [ed: Shang-Tsung] but he was supposed to be a younger version of the old man with a gray beard who was part of the original Mortal Kombat assortment of figures. (I still call him Budo.) He came with a silver helmet reminiscent of the one worn by the evil Shredder of 'Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles' fame and a selection of weapons, none of which were individualized to his character. His body springs back if you twist him at the waist. Now, the hope... and the disappointing truth. The following is a word-for-word (typo's included) transcription of a section from the last newsletter [ed: James DeSimone's GI Joe Club Newsletter] I received from GI Joe guru and moron-extraordinaire James DeSimone. The relevant article is reprinted in it's entirety. [ed: and, of course, this article is the intellectual property of James DeSimone, not the GI Joe 3 3/4" Newsletter]. Several punctuation marks were added in pencil by DeSimone; at these sections I have simply typed in the appropriate mark, but left no space between that mark and the next word. The sections in ( ) are his comments from the article. The sections in [ ] are my own additional remarks. The mistake about the correct number of Commando figures is DeSimone's error; there were five, not six Ninja Commandos (this is Hasbro's spelling of the plural of "Commando," as printed on the card for Storm Shadow seen in the AFN-TR issue). --------------- MAJOR 3 3/4" NEWS In 1993 Hasbro started working on a series of figures called the Ninja Commandos. In 1994 the product was finished. The entire G I Joe line was discontinued, 30 Hasbro employees were eliminated and Joes future was handed over to Kenner all because the wrath of God was upon Hasbro for some terrible atrocities. (that is another story, to understand just follow the events). These 6 figures totaling 10,000 each have been stitting in a warehouse for about 2 years. I have been working on obtaining these figures for a while now. I have been telling my tale of how Marvel comics in the face of eliminating the G I Joe comic due to so many years of comparatively poor sales, allowed the comic to hang in there because of one reason. The G I Joe comic had a very loyal consumer collector following! There was no reason to abandon the comic for as long as its consumer did not abandon the comic. I believe [-We should stress this word-] I have convinced a major retailer to purchase these items from Hasbro to be released as a store exclusive. A very foolish decision was made to abandon tens of thousands of children and collectors around the world. I told these retailers that which ever made the purchase,that I would personally embark on a crusade [-He really thinks he's a religious evangelist, doesn't he?-] to ensure that every last figure was sold. I told them that every month, consistently for over two years I get hundreds of kids inquiring about my books and literally crying on the pages pleading with me (they think I am Hasbro), [-How could they ever get this idea? Couldn't possibly have to do with a little mis-representation on his part, now could it?-] to make and sell them some more 3 3/4" G I Joes!! As you read this,a decision is being made for Hasbro to sell theses figures to one of these major retailers as a small gesture with little effort to acquire,to continue the momentum of the line and satisfy the collecting hunger of thousands of frustrated, let down, abandonded, yet hopeful collectors. My prayers (and I do have faith in the power of prayer) are reaching out in hopes that someone will make the right decision. -------------- End of relevant section. Gee, he's going to pray for us. Gives me a lot of hope... Notice he mentions talking to the retailers, but doesn't mention whether or not he can get anyone in Hasbro to sell the figures to these "major" retailers. I wonder if Fedco counts as "major". He goes on to "pour his heart out" to the 3 3/4" collectors and urge them/us to participate in his show. Knowing what a twit DeSimone is, and how quick he is to make rash announcements before anything has been settled, I'd say there is probably very little chance of the Ninja Commandos being released due to any of his actions, but the fact that these figures still exist does give a little hope. -Article contributed by Joshua Zyber (jzyber@acs.bu.edu) ======================================================================== SHOT IN THE DARK - PART I (ORIGINAL GI JOE FAN FICTION) Ben Thomas, bithomas@eos.ncsu.edu and BThomas828@aol.com May 9, 1996 ------------------------------------------------- So begins my epic saga. This story first appeared in Volume Five-B of Ammo Box, the Steel Brigade Club newsletter, and the actual story is fairly old. However, this is MY version, as I originally wrote it. This story takes place sometime between issues 152 and 155 of the Marvel comic. Armada is the first of many new characters which will appear over the course of my saga. Though I will try to give each story a sense of self-containment, this story is ongoing, as (to my knowledge) no other Joe stories exist. All characters are trademarks of Hasbro, Inc., except for those of my own creation. Comments would be appreciated. Okay, I'll shut up now. ------------------------------------------------------- "Get those Manta Rays covered! We wouldn't want to ruin our surprise visit!" commanded Stalker. His companions were not welcomed guests to Trager's Island; then again, seven well-armed commandoes with intent to inflict serious property damage would have difficulty being welcomed anywhere. One probably wouldn't need to worry about these trigger-happy gentlemen showing up at his door unless he had kidnapped someone important. Cobra had foolishly committed that one iniquity. The events of the day before continued to flash in Stalker's mind. He was told that Robert Sampson, a high-ranking government scientist, was reported missing from his New York home. Witnesses reported hearing helicopters in the night. He possibly could have been kidnapped by some Muslim or Neo-Nazi terrorist group, but the likely suspect was Cobra. They obviously had the resources to pull off such an operation. His team would search the new Cobra stronghold. That was all General Hawk could tell him. He still had no idea what knowledge of the scientist Cobra wanted. "Backblast, what direction?" Stalker asked. The anti-armor specialist looked puzzled as he turned the printout left and right. "This map shows that we should move to the north, but--" "Then, Low-Light, you and Lightfoot take the point, and let's get moving!" *** Cesspool rarely found himself in the position of subordinate, especially not when his superior had less seniority. However, nothing had been ordinary about the arrival of Armada. He came out of nowhere, won a few minor battles in a country virtually devoid of any value to Cobra, and suddenly Cobra Commander put Wonder Boy in a major command position. No amount of complaining from the CEO could sway the Commander's opinion. "Beautiful, is it not?" Armada's inquisition brought Cesspool back to reality. "Well, yes, I suppose," Cesspool replied, trying to conceal his utter amazement. Not every day did a person see a monstrosity like the Black Phoenix. The craft reminded him of a C-130 Hercules, only at least ten times larger. "The Techno-Vipers should complete all technical work on it by the week's end. Pardon me if I am overcome with excitement!" Armada certainly seemed full of himself. "I would love nothing more than to allow you to oversee the construction of our future, but I already have qualified people working on that task." The man in black and gold extended his arm to place around Cesspool's shoulder. He had to reach downward to an extent, as he dwarfed the ex- businessman by a good five inches. "Your talents are needed for infinitely more challenging purposes. For instance, the shower heads in the level five washroom need tightening." Major D'Alleva could hardly believe his ears. No one addressed him in such a derogatory manner! "Sir, you can't be serious!" "Of course not!" replied Armada, nearly coughing from his violent laughs. "You should really learn to loosen up, Major. Stress has been proven to shorten your life span. But seriously, I need you to monitor the efforts of our security system. I have this haunting feeling that we will have visitors in the near future. Meanwhile, I have urgent matters to which I must attend." The island commander then turned to proceed to other branches of the complex. A short walk brought D'Alleva to the communications wing. Several Tele- Vipers were seated at computer consoles, alertly checking the status of each station. "Tele-Viper 23, have the security measures been activated?" "Yes, sir, all systems are operational and transmitting," the startled Viper replied. Cesspool stared at the console for about ten seconds. "Good. Be sure to inform our commander as soon as one stops transmitting. I'm sure the Joes won't stay away much longer. After all, the commander's getting the shivers!" *** Suddenly, Snake Eyes rolled to the front the group, throwing his arms in a manner seeking to halt the team. He gestured to his right ear and pointed to the east. Stalker learned many years ago to interpret the warnings of his friend despite the man's severe difficulty with speech. "Yes, I do hear something . . . vaguely sounds like screams. Surely it's not this easy! Caution, men! Let's check this out!" The screams originated from a nearby clearing. A scout camp had been set up, showing Cobra's dedication to enforcement of illegal-immigration laws. Several Vipers were torturing a female hostage. "Five of them. Snakes, you, Pathfinder, and I take them out. Silent weapons." Apparently, only one Viper was patrolling the camp. As he routinely walked past the tent, he was greeted with a silver katana to the neck. Instantly, his head separated from the rest of his body with a crackle. The android body fell to the ground, no longer receiving the necessary signals to function. In an instant, Stalker knew that he had fallen for the oldest trick of warfare. "It's a trap! Backblast, cover fire!" Backblast's specialty was knocking out aircraft, but his talents along with his missile launcher proved multi-talented in dispensing Battle Android Troopers too. The blast didn't leave enough parts for the junkyard. "Well, if they're gonna leave us a trap, they'd better try a little harder!" Lightfoot's cursory examination of the patrolling BAT confirmed his initial fears. "Sir, this BAT was wired with a transmitter. I'd say we've been discovered." "In that case, we'd better take a more scenic route. Backblast?" *** Tele-Viper 23 watched as all the blips from his monitor ceased to blink. "Sir, the group in sector 5-C has ended transmissions." "Are you certain it was not a power failure or some sort of natural interference?" "Positive, sir." "Good work, then. Page Commander Armada." The Tele-Viper pointed to the intercom. "You already have? Even better." Cesspool smiled, thoughts of the the look on Armada's face under the helmet once he heard the news. "Commander, the Joes have arrived! In fact, they've already compromised the inner wall! I don't know how much longer we can hold them off!" "Ah! You are learning to let the inner comedian flow forth! For the time being, leave them be." "What?! These are the Joes we're talking about!" "Yes, that is what you said. I would like to give the jungle element a chance first . . ." ======================================================================= GI JOE SURVEY AND THE "TOY ZONE" FANZINE Those of you that have been collecting 3 3/4" GI Joe for awhile have no doubt heard the name Thomas Wheeler a.k.a. GI Trekker. Thomas is one of the most prominent and active 3 3/4" GI Joe toy collectors that I know and has done a lot of great work on behalf of the 3 3/4" GI Joe collecting community. One of the great things Thomas has been been doing is running an ongoing 3 3/4" GI Joe survey. I strongly encourage you to contact him and request a copy of the survey if you have not done so already. This is your chance to express your opinion on 3 3/4" Joes and your desire to see them return to the toy market. Thomas describes the survey as follows: "A survey for 3 3/4" G.I.Joe collectors is still available. Here's your chance to help bring about the return of the Real American Hero! All results will be sent to Hasbro. E-mail "gitrekker@aol.com" with your postal (snail-mail) address. Sorry, but the survey is a little too long to e-mail. I've tried. Doesn't work. Thanks, and YO JOE!" I would also like to mention Thomas' new fanzine "Toy Zone." I had the pleasure of reviewing the introductory issue of the Toy Zone. He has put together an excellent fanzine with current toys news, rumors, humor, and best of all: some healthy opinion! The Toy Zone is not GI Joe-specific but knowing Thomas you can expect to see all the late- breaking news about GI Joe and other 3 3/4" action figures in each issue. Contact Thomas at GITrekker@aol.com to check it out! ======================================================================= ROLE-PLAYING GI JOE Are you interested in role-playing GI Joe 3 3/4" characters but didn't think D&D was quite the right environment? Read on to find out how you can role-play GI Joe in an environment designed for military characters. A.R.R.O.W.S.(TM) Military Superheroes(TM) RolePlaying Game Thirteen Stars(TM) is a nearly year-old G.I.Joe organization. Each of us takes a Call Sign in the spirit of military toys, Special-Forces- style comic and movie characters, or superheroes for that matter. We've gathered together for the purpose of inventing a new roleplaying game which specializes in representing the actions of Military Superheroes(TM). Very early on in our effort, we endeavored to make the project generic rather than depending on licensing expensive rights from toy companies. Our generic Military Superheroes(TM) are called the A.R.R.O.W.S.(TM) [America's Rapid Response Operational Warfare Service(TM)] and the villains they face are known collectively as Draco(TM). A copy of the Beta version of the A.R.R.O.W.S.(TM) Military Superheroes(TM) Roleplaying Game is available from: AMSRG HQ 3000 Ford Road Suite G-1 Bristol, PA 19007 The cost of $5 covers printing, handling and shipping. Feedback is appreciated. We're always looking for new talent. A.R.R.O.W.S. point the way! [ed: you can also contact Frank Truelove (Frank_M_Truelove@rohmhaas.com) for more information on the A.R.R.O.W.S. system] ======================================================================= READY FOR A SING-ALONG? Have you been fretting over the fact that you can't recall the words to those great theme songs for the 3 3/4" Joe cartoons? Fret no more, and sing along as you read. :))) Theme from G.I. JOE He'll fight for freedom wherever there's trouble, G.I. Joe is there! G.I. Joe! (a real American hero!) G.I. Joe is there! It's G.I. Joe against Cobra the enemy, fighting to save the day! He never gives up, he's always there, fighting for freedom over land and air! G.I. Joe! (a real American hero!) G.I. Joe is there! Spoken: G.I. Joe is the code name for America's daring, highly-trained special-mission force. It's purpose: to defend human freedom against Cobra: a ruthless, terrorist organization determined to rule the world. He never gives up, he'll stay 'til the fight's won, G.I. Joe will dare! G.I. Joe! (a real American hero!) G.I. Joe! Theme from G.I. JOE: The Movie: ----------------------------------------------------- Crashing through the sky, comes a fearful cry: Cobra! (Cobra!) Cobra! (Cobra!) Armies of the night, evil taking flight: Cobra! (Cobra!) Cobra! (Cobra!) Nowhere to run. Nowhere to hide. Panic spreading far and wide, Who can turn the tide? G.I. Joe! (a real American hero!) G.I. Joe will dare! G.I. Joe! (a real American hero!) G.I. Joe is there! Fighting for freedom wherever there's trouble over land and sea and air, G.I. Joe is there! Can the world oppose, the deadliest of foes? Cobra! (Cobra!) Cobra! (Cobra!) Joes will risk it all, to end the evil call of: Cobra! (Cobra!) Cobra! (Cobra!) They never give up. They never say die. Walking tall with banners high, they sound the battle cry! (Yo Joe! Yo Joe!) G.I. Joe! (a real American hero!) G.I. Joe will dare! G.I. Joe! (a real American hero!) G.I. Joe is there! Fighting for freedom wherever there's trouble over land and sea and air, G.I. Joe is there! Spoken: G.I. Joe is the code name for America's daring, highly-trained special-mission force. It's purpose: to defend human freedom against Cobra: a ruthless, terrorist organization determined to rule the world. G.I. Joe! (a real American hero!) G.I. Joe will dare! G.I. Joe! (a real American hero!) G.I. Joe is there! Fighting for freedom wherever there's trouble over land and sea and air, G.I. Joe is there! G.I. Joe! (a real American hero!) G.I. Joe is there! G.I. Joe! Transcribed by James McFadden jmmcfadden@holycross.edu / jmmcfadden@prodigy.com ======================================================================= DEALER SECTION Someone you may want to contact who I have heard carries a lot of 3 3/4" GI Joe merchandise (sorry, I do not have a phone number): - Len & Kathy's Antique Shop 1238 South Beach Blvd. Anaheim, CA standard disclaimer: No one listed above has given any special "kickbacks" or favors to be listed. In some cases they don't even know they're being listed. No dealer will be given a list subscriber's e-mail address. You must contact the dealer on your own behalf. Transactions between you and anyone listed above are in no way the responsiblity of the GI Joe 3 3/4" Newsletter. ======================================================================== HASBRO WEB SITE Hasbro is now on the World Wide Web. Point your browser to: http://www2.hasbrotoys.com/hasbro/home.html. Thanks to Frank Truelove and Gerry Coffman for making this site known to me. You can find information on the upcoming 12" Joes and GI Joe Extreme (boooo!!!!! hisssss!) as well. There is currently no 3 3/4" GI Joe-related material on the site but perhaps if we all wish hard enough something will turn up. :) ======================================================================== ISSUE #4 PREVIEW! - Now that 3 3/4" GI Joe is not longer in stores do other 3 3/4" action figures turn your head? Next issue will feature several articles on other great 3 3/4" toy lines that can expand your "GI Joe universe." See you next issue. Yo Joe! ======================================================================== SUBSCRIPTION INFO Currently all subscriptions, unsubscriptions, and e-mail address changes are being handled manually. If you require one of the above simply send a message to the list moderator requesting such. Did you miss an issue or did your issue get trashed? Just let the list moderator know and we'll correct the situation immediately! Don't forget - all back issues are archived on the Newsletter web page!